7 Comments

Your closing sentence, Egor got me thinking maybe that's true; it can be enough, especially since memories come and go and reshape with our thinking; rarely are they fixed.

I used to think time and our health were most important and while I think health still is I now believe it is not so much about time but where we choose to place our attention. Brilliant, profound essay, with enjoyable to read vivid details.

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My father, in his last year on earth, lost his ability to express himself, along with other faculties. That, I think, was the most frustrating for him. As a writer, I do think that would be unimaginable.

If there is no future then remembering the past is irrelevant. Thanks for a thought-provoking work.

J

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Watching a person we love disappear into the themselves and from the world is heart-breaking, and another tragedy for them entirely. I am sorry you had to go through it. We must live fully while we can. From your work, I discern you are doing just that.

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There are so many things I dislike about being older and forgetful. The annoyance of looking for my glasses, or forgetting my grocery list and sometimes items on it, even if I have it along. Harder things like events that my children remember with clarity and are lost to me. The losses outweigh the benefits. But I’m healthy happy and secure, and have the luxury of having a loving, understanding family. One benefit that I’ve recognized and appreciate is the ability to be in the moment. It’s easier. The things I used to worry about, the self-consciousness that plagued me—those have lessened to the point that I can be present, aware that every encounter, family gathering, special event, or conversation is to be enjoyed now. I feel myself reflecting on this in real time and how it enhances the moment. Whether I’ll remember it tomorrow is another question.

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You are describing the gains I chased for years. Being in the moment, comfort with my own silence, relief from self-doubt and a better idea of what matters most. I am accruing these slowly but not at a pace to feel a net gain. It seems, I am a bucket that fits only so many things, with each gain there is a little loss. Unfortunately, you are talking about the price that is steeper than we wish. It is wonderful to read your perspective. Thank you for reading.

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Being in the last year of my twenties, I'm still young - but I appreciate reading this and being aware of something I have without noticing. "Time" is the personal resource often labelled as the most important. But things like memory and health can just as easily make time irrelevant depending on one's condition. Thank you for the reminder. Finally - It's been a while since I read an essay written with such flair for dialogue. I'm seeing The Sun Also Rises fan in you now :D Stay safe and healthy!

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Thank you, John. I am slowly realizing that the personal resources I have, such as time, gain value when I add awareness into the mix. Especially the awareness of the current moment, and how important it is to be in it. That lady had that, and she was happy :-)

I don’t think one can read The Sun Also Rises without a change in how one writes. Hopefully, it is all for the better!

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